HELP ME WIN THE CESAR MILLAN CONTEST!
Help me meet the Dog Whisperer!
For those who don’t read anything more than a paragraph:
(1) Click this hyperlink: [CLICK HERE TO VOTE]
(2) Scroll down to FREE VOTE (you can do the paid batches if you’re feeling super!)
(3) Vote
(4) Fill out email and password
(5) Receive email and use code to verify
(More details are listed below)
I’M IN A CONTEST TO MEET CESAR MILLAN, The Dog Whisperer and win a 1-on-1 dog training session with him (oh, and also $10,000)! I have wanted him to write the Forward to a book I wrote called The 10 Commandments of Dog Training [unpublished] and this contest presented itself and I thought, “God works in mysterious ways—how else would Tampon Tim be on the ticket?
Two weeks ago, I got a new dog and a 1-on-1 session with the Emperor Cesar would help me boost my current jester status to “Jester with bells on his hat,” which in the jester world is a serious upgrade.
ROUND 1 — Groups of 30 people (I’m in group 49 out of Lord knows how many!)
ROUND 2 — Half of the entrants eliminated [I MADE IT!]
ROUND 3 — One-third of the remaining entrants eliminated [I MADE IT!]
ROUND 4 — DETERMINED AUGUST 26. Five people advance in each group of 10 (another 50% cut). I’m currently ranked 4th in my group of 10.
ROUND 5+ — I am guessing they will do at least one more cut. Eventually judges will decide among the remaining contestants.
HOW TO VOTE
Unlike in politics, I don’t think this voting will be influenced by the Russians in 2016, the safest election ever in 2020 and, depending on who wins in 2024, either “hacked” or “the voice of the people.”
(1) Click this hyperlink: [CLICK HERE TO VOTE]
(2) Scroll down. Underneath the paid batches of votes there is a FREE VOTE option. (Of course, you can pay $1/vote for 20, 40, 100+ votes if you are feeling like you want to give me a boost, like the Secret Service agents gave Trump’s would-be assassin onto the rooftop. They put 500 VOTES in yellow so, according to Internet marketing, that must be the one the all the cool kids are doing. Don’t you want to be a cool kid?)
(3) Vote for me (this is my specific link so you can’t really fuck this up
(4) Fill out your email and create a password. This is one hoop they will ask you to jump through and I totally understand the knee-jerk reaction of, “I’m out!” I haven’t jumped through any hoops since I was an elephant in the circus, although I still dump huge piles of shit on the floor. I don’t generally like to give my personal information away but this tends to be the price of admission.
(5) Spread the message to your friends and post on your social media. I’m a realist and am pretty sure few to no one is going to tell a friend or post it but I do believe many of you will vote. Some of you? One person because they lost in a drinking game? No, screw that—all of you! Here is a link to share this Substack story:
(6) Check your email and verify. They will send you a code.
I like cash as much as the next person but my real goal is to meet Cesar and pitch him to write the Forward to my unpublished book…
THE 10 COMMANDMENTS OF DOG TRAINING: Building better relationships with your four-legged and two-legged companions
Thank you for your support!
Satya
Did you advance🤔